An acquaintance criticized football players for kneeling during the anthem. I asked how the players could better broadcast their protest of violence toward minorities. She said that the highly paid players should spend their money to do this in another venue. I felt unable to change her opinion. I could only say that the kneeling protest got the desired result of getting us to talk about racial inequity. … [Read more...]
No follow-up
Our school staff were assigned to read The Little Book of Restorative Justice in Education last year. Unfortunately, there were no students physically in school, so there were no opportunities to practice the lessons. There has been no follow-up this year. This lack of follow-up feels all too familiar. Our School Improvement Plan has African American Students as the focus group for Improving School Quality. "Relationship building" is the focus action. But without instruction to staff, there is … [Read more...]
the Presence of an Accent?
Does the Presence of an Accent mean the Lack of Intelligence in HoCo? A couple of months ago, my mother and I went to the doctor's office, and once the receptionist heard the accented words leave my mother's mouth to announce that she was here for her appointment, she immediately got irritated and repeated that she could not understand my mother at all. It continued like that for about a minute until my mom asked me to repeat what she had said. I could see that my mother was struggling and … [Read more...]
Grocery time
I have been sticking close to home for the last few months. One of the few places I go is the grocery store. There is such a discrepancy between who is shopping and who is stocking/checking out/bagging - working hard and with long hours and probably not very significant compensation or recognition. It’s striking to witness these disparities in Howard County - a place that claims high levels of diversity, inclusion, and successes for all people in the region. … [Read more...]
Sharing and listening
Our pastor seemed to change his attitude about the need to address race relations explicitly in church when African Americans in the congregation shared their feelings of woundedness … [Read more...]
Transportation Equity
I think the new initiative offering Middle School and HS students free public bus passes is a fabulous step toward equity and inclusion. … [Read more...]
Coming Together for a Good Cause
I attended the ribbon cutting of the library equity collection and was impressed both by the contents of the collection and by the representation of groups that attended the ceremony. … [Read more...]
Trying?
I have noticed a general increased effort of HoCo citizens to connect / relate, assist and show courtesy while out on trips to the grocery store or other errands. … [Read more...]
School Redistricting
The Redistricting of Howard County Schools - it is was obvious that it was racial. Residents did not care about equity. They used devaluing of their property as an excuse. … [Read more...]
Not My HOA
My community was experiencing some conflicts between a renter and an owner that live in townhomes built directly across from one another. The Renter was a Black Woman with a child and the Owner was a White Man and his family of 4. The Owner took issues with things they observed going on in or around the renter's home involving police and also gripes about parking issues. The Renter complained that she was constantly being racially harassed by the Owner. She claimed she had been … [Read more...]
Group Equity, Individual Liberty & Equality
Racial equity is realized when individual liberty and rights are respected. There is no group equity and equality when individual rights are violated. The purpose of getting organized is to shape government policies not take away individuals rights or undermine individual liberty. … [Read more...]
Sharing Ice Cream
My neighbor celebrated her young daughter's birthday by renting an ice cream truck and sharing ice cream with her guests and neighbors. The truck was ran by folks who support social justice interests, it was a nice way to learn about their efforts and get to know folks in the neighborhood. … [Read more...]
Intentional Engagement
I am a part of a Rotary Club that has recently read the book White Fragility and are having intentional engagement to address implicit bias. … [Read more...]
Racism Fatigue
Conversations have continued vigorously on the subject of racism and anti-racism. That is progress, but with that progress I have experienced what I would term "racism fatigue". I hear comments such as, "I'm tired of talking about racism and white privilege,", etc. These are good people voicing these sentiments: friends, colleagues, family. I think the weariness comes from, after becoming aware of white privilege and racism, what then? What can we do? As individuals, as community leaders, as … [Read more...]
Don’t Miss the Message
While driving through a neighborhood yesterday I saw a hand made sign on the corner that said " BLACK LIVES MATTERS ", My first thought was that the sign was grammatically incorrect and then I realized that I was missing the message. This sign may be the most significant and most heartfelt one I've ever seen, It was hand made and a bit sloppy, weathered and leaning over. Similar to the lives it represents. It's had me thinking ever since I saw it. So much so, that I'm going to go back by and … [Read more...]
Need Better Communication
I sat in on a Racial Equity Task Force meeting, where I heard one speaker's testimony that was very troubling and misinformed, which targeted one specific ethnicity in Howard County. The backlash to that testimony was very aggressive but no solution or communication was reached. This was indicative to me of the work and communication that is still yet to be achieved. … [Read more...]
Kids growing in culturally diverse schooling
My grandson is 8. He is half Korean, half white, but looks totally white. He attends elementary school here in Columbia, a school which is half African-American and only 20% white. All his best friends from pre-K to grade 2 have been black. A year or two ago, he told me that when he grows up he wants to be black. We had to explain that that is not possible. I love seeing him playing with his friends and learning about people and cultures different from ours. This gives me hope that children here … [Read more...]
Inclusion Empathy and Understanding
A Howard County citizen heads up a group that teaches kids and teens how to treat other kids, teens and adults using inclusion, empathy and with understanding. The kids and teens are practicing these ideas by inviting into their circle of friends other children and teens who they might not practice their own cultural practices. This is the start of uniting people and getting to know each other on a one to one basis. … [Read more...]
Inspired
This year, in our program, we have elevated the dialog with our class about DEI and specifically racial equity. the open, honest discussions as people have shared their issues and challenges has inspired me because of the support and encouragement the class has given one another. … [Read more...]
Sick and tired of being sick and tired
I had a long conversation a few months ago with a self-identified Black African American woman leader who's a native born Columbian. She's been active with several community and progressive political action committees as well. After just asking her, how she's doing, she unloaded a ton about her frustration in working with some well-intended but passive white bystanders within one of the committees she's worked in. I noticed just how exhausted and stressed she was and encouraged her to center … [Read more...]
School Equity
It was disturbing to see the serious opposition to school equity plan. last year. Especially here, in Columbia, which was supposed to be founded on equality. … [Read more...]
Placing Blame Instead of Taking Responsibility
I was recently on an email thread about CA/village elections. There are currently no people of color of on the Board. The exchange started with someone raising the need to get people of color elected to the Board, and unfortunately the responses were defensive and blamed people of color for not being more involved in village boards rather than recognizing that we have a system which is clearly not inclusive. … [Read more...]
Affirmative Action and safety
During a church related zoom meeting, a mature, white, female made the statement (which was off topic): "I don't know why they insist that women and black people have to be hired as pilots. The best candidates should be chosen, regardless of who they are." I wanted to ask her if she felt that safety had been compromised because of affirmative action, but it was not the topic of the meeting, and since it was zoom, there was no usual break time to chat. I am frustrated that I'll have to wait until … [Read more...]
The Bridge that can Unite Us
I live in Montgomery County, but work in Howard County. I see the same challenges present. I do not have a particular story, at the moment. However, I have seen instances in which, a little kindness could go a long way, in resolving issues, or differences. I believe sharing stories, is the bridge to understanding each other better, and really seeing the other person, as Us, collectively, for a better future. I am very excited and look forward to what others' stories are. … [Read more...]
Self-Realization
I increased my awareness of racism by expanding my circle of friends and learning about their experiences of overt and covert racism, and institutional racism. Why did I do this? I don't want to live in an unjust society and realize I need to do something, no matter how small, to contribute to social justice. I want to be an ally, to to become more empathetic, to understand my friends not as victims, but as humans like my self with similar aspirations. If I can make this leap and begin a new … [Read more...]
Connecting with others
Last month I participated in a Howard County gathering for Courageous Conversations. My group of roughly ten participants included African Americans and other races, Christians, Jews, Muslims and other religions. In our challenging and open discussion, I was particularly struck by one very articulate African American women who commented after a lifetime of struggle with systemic racism and this summer's black lives matter events said she was simply exhausted; it was simply exhausting on a daily … [Read more...]
Too Close for COVID
I'm a Black woman, and I used the large pool in Columbia during Covid. My observation at the pool was that most folks were happy to follow the new Covid protocols - no matter what race. There were a few occasions, however, when a pool patron was unwilling to follow the rules. I noticed that when a person of color was around the pool and their mask was on improperly (or not at all) - there was swift action from the pool staff to ask them to either put the mask on or pull the mask up. I also … [Read more...]
New to HOCO
I am new to Howard County, so I am still coming to an understanding of "typical race relations" here. What I can say is, I have never experienced the level of commitment to conversation and knowledge surrounding racial equity and race relations that I have seen in Howard County. … [Read more...]
Starting the conversation
My 10-year-old niece, who is white (as am I), was telling me a story of something that happened to her, and referred to someone in the story as "a man who had dark skin." I waited until she was done, and then asked her why she referred to that man as having dark skin instead of just saying that he was black. She said that she felt bad referring to someone as black, because she didn't want anyone to think she was racist. She also wasn't sure if he was African-American, and Islander, etc., and … [Read more...]
Now They Know
I participated in the Howard County Equity Collaborative. It was interesting to gather a group of citizens who want to see change in the county, but didn't always realize their own biases. There were some Asian participants who had not felt the sting of being considered less than or being hated until the COVID 19 pandemic hit. They became targets for hatred comments and other negative behaviors. Then they understood what many African Americans have gone through for many many years. … [Read more...]
Hope for change
Neighbors and colleagues who, in the past, would have avoided acknowledging or discussing racism, microagressions, and their existence in Howard County - either because of discomfort or denial - are now engaging in these discussions. I find this encouraging because we can only begin to address these if we admit that it is happening here. … [Read more...]
Passed Over
This experience is something that happened 6-7 years ago at a previous job in which I worked. I don't know if I would consider it "racism" vs some sort of implicit bias of what senior leadership felt I was capable of doing in a job. I'm not sure. But, I was working at this job for over 10 years in a managerial position overseeing 4 locations. Senior leadership decided to restructure my position and hire a Director over each location. I did apply for the restructured position, and was not … [Read more...]
I Read It in a Book
During a Battle of the Books team meeting with my daughter, we were discussing excerpts from Kekla Magoon's, The Season of Styx Malone. One of the white students couldn't believe that a parent would ever encourage their child to be ordinary and just keep their head down. The family in question is black. We then went on to discuss how the parent was trying to keep his black sons safe. It gave me so much hope to know that we can raise our white children to really see, advocate for, and amplify the … [Read more...]
